How Can u Go To HEaven!!??

I was testing the children in my Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven.

I asked them, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, Would that get me into Heaven?"

"NO!" the children answered.

"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?"

Again, the answer was, "NO!"

By now I was starting to smile.

Hey, this was fun!

"Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into Heaven?"

I asked them again. Again, they all answered, "NO!"


I was just bursting with pride for them. "Well," I continued, "then how can I get into Heaven?"

A five-year-old boy shouted out,

"YOU GOTTA BE DEAD."

Online Relationships

Online Relationships

When we say online relationship, we are not talking about thousands of matrimonial sites online, who are trying to getting people married. Here it means the relation people make by talking to people online maybe someone you don’t know, no matters if he/she lives far away from you. It’s not necessary that you have to be in love with the other person, maybe friends, but because of some people, some of us are afraid to have an internet relationship, because they think they will end up getting or they don’t know weather the person sitting on the other end is really sincere or even he or she is even exist. I personally think that it is a good idea to have internet relationships, because it don’t bound us in a specific circle of people, it let us meet million of people who have different views, different thoughts, different behavior, thorough which we can learn how to interact with all different kinds of people.

For some people, including me, who are maybe shy or socially isolated internet is a way to meet their life partners. I personally don’t believe in “blind date” cause maybe after meeting the person there is a chance that one will end up getting hurt, maybe you don’t like the person or maybe the person don’t like you. So instead of having a blind date a person should interact with each other through online, so that way they can’t get real feeling towards each other and if they want to take their relationship to another level they can do it by meeting or talking on phone, which, I think, is better than a blind date.

Some people have made these relationships a fiasco; some people are abusing these relationships. The number of teenagers I met and talk about this, most of them, especially girls, were afraid of it because of getting sexually abuse. The key to a relationship, before taking it to another level, is to know that person a little more and then if you think they are the one you are looking for then make a relationship with them. Some people are just too desperate; they don’t think who they are talking to all they know is that they want to be with that person, either because they are gorgeous or they are wealthy. These kinds of people can forget their self respect and after getting hurt or abuse, they say that it’s all because it was a person from online, which I think is totally wrong. So I think that people should trust online dating, and they only choose the right person, or either they will end up getting hurt or abused.

Matrix Clip In Urdu...chek it out!!!

English in hindi...Damn Funny!!!!

Have a nice day! —–> Achcha din lo!

What’s up? —–>Uppar kya hai?

You’re kidding! —–>Tum bachcha bana rahe ho!

Don’t kid me! —–> Mera bachcha mat banaao!

Cool man! —–> Thandaa aadmi!

Check this out, man! —-> Iskee chaanbeen karo, aadmi!

Don’t mess with me, dude.—–> Mere saath gandagi mat karo, e vyakti.

She’s so fine! —– > Woh itnee baareek hai!

Listen buddy, that chick’s mine, okay!?—–> Suno dost, woh ladki
mera hai, theek?

Hey good looking; what’s cooking? —-> Arrey sundarta ki devi; kya
pakaa rahee ho?

Are you nuts? —–> Kya aap akhrot hain?

Son of a gun.—–> Bachcha bandook ka.

Rock the party. —-> Party mein patthar feko.

Piss Off!!——->Su su Bujhao!!

Lets hang out!—->Chalo bahar latakte hai

Munna Bhai Jokes!!!

PROFESSOR : Gandhi Jayanti ke baray mein kya jantey ho?
MUNNA BHAI : Gandhi bahut jabardast aadmi tha, Baap. Maa Kasam, par apun ko yeh nehin malum ke yeh Jayanti kaun hai.
______________________________

CIRCUIT : Bhai, Bapu NE bola tha ke kabhi jhoot nehin bolna mangta hai. Apun aaj se kabhi jhoot nehin bolega Bhai.
MUNNA BHAI : Aye Circuit, who Sunita ka baap aya hai terayko dund rehla hai.
CIRCUIT : Bhai usko bolo apun gaon gaya hai, kheti karneko.
MUNNA BHAI : Par Circuit, abhi to TU bola kabhi jhoot nehin bolega.
CIRCUIT : Bhai, apun jhoot nehin bolega, par tum to bol sakta hai na.
______________________________

MAMU : Chand toh raat ko nikalta hai, aaj din mein kaise nikal aya?
GIRL : Ullu to raat ko bolta hai, aaj din mein kaise bol pada?
_______________________________

CIRCUIT : Bhai, who apnay bachpan ka dost aarehla aaj raat ko dinner pe. Mera Sara chain collection apnay kamray mein chupa do na please.
MUNNABHAI : Kyun tera dost chor hai kya?
CIRCUIT : Nehin Bhai, who apnay chain pechan lega.
________________________________

MAMU : Bhai, apnay ko char mahinay mein Tamil sikhna padega. Kuch upay batao.
MUNNA BHAI : Kannada kyun, aur char mahinay ka kya chakkar hai?
MAMU : Meinay ek Tamil baccha adopt kiya hai, aur who char mahinay mein bolne lagay Ga.
_______________________________

PROFESSOR : Akal badi ki bhais?
MUNNA BHAI : Bole toh pehlay date of birth Bata mamu.
______________________________

MUNNA BHAI : Circuit, bole toh yeh Ford kya hai?
CIRCUIT : Bhai, gaadi hai.
MUNNA BHAI : Toh phir, yeh Oxford kya hai?
CIRCUIT : Bole toh, simple hai bhai, Ox mane Bael, Ford mane gaadi. Oxford bole toh Baelgaadi.
______________________________

Circuit takes a flight to Singapore and he is seated next to an Englishman. Circuit open his tiffin and serves himself a roti.
ENGLISHMAN : What is this?
CIRCUIT : Bread India
Circuit then open the box of jalebi.
ENGLISHMAN : What is this?
CIRCUIT : Sweet India
With all the food he hogged on, Munna farts. The Englishman is offended and in shock asks …
ENGLISHMAN : What is that?
CIRCUIT : Air India
________________________________

CIRCUIT : Aye Mamu, tereko papad aur jhapad mein pharak pata hai kya?
MAMU : Nehin.
CIRCUIT : To kha ke dekh Le, pata chal jayega.
____________________________

MUNNA BHAI : Mamu, apun bachpan mein dus maley ke building se gir gaya tha.
MAMU : Aarey, phir kya hua. Bach gaya ki tapak gaya?
MUNNA BHAI : Yaad nehin hai yaar. Bahut purane baat hai.
____________________________

MUNNA BHAI : Mamu, TU kitna pada hai?
MAMU : B.A.
MUNNA BHAI : Sala, two akshar pada aur who bhi ulta?
________________________________

MAMU : Oye, maar gayay yaar. Meri biwi aur premika saath saath AA rehla hai.
MAMU KA DOST : Arrey, mein bhi yehi bolnewala tha.
________________________________

CIRCUIT : Oye Short Circuit yeh light bulb pe baap ka naam kya likh raha hai?
SHORT CIRCUIT : Apun baap ka naam roshan kar rehle hai.
________________________________

PRINCIPAL : Agar koi ladka girls hostel mein gaya toh first time 100 Rs fine, 2nd time 200 Rs. Fine and 3rd time 500.
MUNNA BHAI : Boley to Monthly paas ka kya lega Mamu